Be wary when drinking around loved ones who are in recovery this festive season, says addiction expert

FIGHTING alcoholism can be challenging. Abuse can result in addiction when a drug or behaviour is used as a catalyst, but some abuse patterns can result in addiction so severe that it is hard to overcome without help from medical professionals.

As the holidays approach and we gear up for the festivities, alcohol is often part of the plan to have fun and relax. But if you have a loved one in early recovery, you should consider quitting alcohol yourself, says addiction expert Sheryl Rahme, who has been sober and in recovery for 23 years and has worked in the treatment industry for almost as long.

Rahme says asking families to refrain from drinking is something families just don’t want to hear.

Alcoholism has several causes, all interrelated. However, for a variety of reasons, some people are more susceptible to becoming an alcoholic than others. According to studies, those who battle alcoholism have remarkable changes to the brain.

These changes affect a person’s actions, making them extremely difficult to control. Alcoholism looks different in different people. Some folks may drink copiously throughout the day. Others may only binge drink once or twice a week.

Rahme, the founder and director of Changes Addiction Rehab in Northcliff, Johannesburg, advises that families of addicts maintain a sober household and host festivities where alcohol is not permitted.

Rahme says often, family members will say they are not the ones with a problem, so why should they change?

They contend that after a challenging year, they deserve a drink around the holidays to unwind and reward themselves.

“I challenge family members who are unwilling to forgo alcohol, even temporarily: What’s your relationship with alcohol that you won’t do without it for a while?”

If you have an alcohol problem, as soon as you have a drink or two, she explains, it unleashes the obsession again, she says. You will either quickly return to your drug of choice or consume enormous amounts of alcohol once the obsession is released, both of which will have dire consequences.

Rahme says regardless of the substance an addict or alcoholic uses, they will feel “the need to get utterly drunk and out of it”.

“When my brother left a rehab facility years ago, my mother was serving wine at the dinner table. He downed the glass and excused himself to visit the restroom. Before we even realised he was gone, he had already left for Hillbrow to get drugs,” she recalled.

Rahme also had a client who heeded her counsel many years ago and organised a Christmas party for 250 guests where no alcohol was served, in support of the recovering addict. They all had a great time, and 10 years later, he is still sober.

“We need to re-frame the perception that you can only have fun with alcohol because it is not true,” she said.